Band of Troublemakers

I have this neighbor that a lot of people seem to admire and look up to. I think it is time to set the record straight. I mean sure, she looks wonderful when she shows up at church, together, nicely dressed, with a swarm of little boys all in their white shirts and ties, behaving respectably (mostly) while the talks are going on.

But what most people DON'T know is that they have a chicken killing dog (our poor innocent little chickens!) who leaves their lawn clean while leaving little "presents" on ours, they leave hazardous objects on their driveway that kids (mine) can break their arms on, there's trails on our lawn made by the aforementioned horde of little boys (and dog), that big strong husband of hers breaks trampolines (ours), and they are always "borrowing" stuff that they seem to have run out of. I caught a picture of the real Missy, here included, so that people no longer need be decieved.

If she tries to tell you that we killed her dog, flooded their home, broke her kid's arm, or borrow their stuff all the time too, it's just the kind of thing she would do. Don't believe a word of it!!!

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Life changing insights

Figuring people out has always been a fascinating and helpful hobby of mine. Last year I was introduced to the "Wired that Way" personality tools. It's not like I haven't enjoyed and learned from other ways of looking at things, and as I've researched more, I have learned that many different people categorize personality in rather similar fashions, but this one was nontechnical yet specific enough that I thought I would share a much reduced version of it. (Ideally, the four categories are arranged in a square with the yellow and red quadrants across the top, and green and blue across the bottom in that order, but I wasn't able to format this blog that way).

Let's do it the fun way.
Desire to have fun.
Need affection attention, approval, acceptance.
Creative, optimistic, light touch.
They excite, inspire, persuade others.
Probably should talk less, get organized and learn to tell the time.

Let's do it my way.
Desire to have control.
Need sense of obedience, accomplish a lot, are usually right.
They are self-confident, restless, and at times overpowering.
Probably should delegate more, be more patient, and be more appreciative.

Let's do it the easy way.
Desire to avoid conflict, keep peace .
Need feeling of worth, emotional support, sense of respect.
They mediate, objectively solve problems, have an even disposition, and a will of iron.
Probably should become more self motivated, move faster, face own problems as well as they handle those of others.

Let's do it the right way.
Desire to do it right.
Need stability, space, sensitivity, support.
They have high standards, compassion, analyze deeply, are creative, organize well.
Probably should lighten up, allow others to be imperfect.

Most of us have one personality type that is predominant, with a secondary type that has an effect on our character as well. Of course, nothing is 100% and we can (should) all learn skills from all personality types, but it is helpful to know what comes naturally. In any case, it has been an interesting exercise in understanding myself, and in figuring out my family. Someone who is motivated by fun just isn't going to be into job charts and schedules. It makes a difference in which options I choose when dealing with people, and it makes a difference in how I motivate myself. The Red/Green combination, and Yellow/Blue combination conflict with each other in a lot of ways and tend not to be natural pairings--look at them and think about it and you will see why!

Realizing where my heart lies (after all these years of thinking it lies somewhere else) has changed my outlook--my goals have not been affected so much as my plans on how to achieve them. School, employment, our society in general seems to demand of us to spend a lot of time in the blue quadrant. Certainly I have been well trained in that area and derive satisfaction from functioning well in it. But I have realized I feel most alive in other quadrants, and knowing that those other characteristics are natural and the way I'm made has freed up a lot of energy and allows me to enjoy activities that previously I had felt were just too frivolous and irrelevant to the serious business of living to be indulged. Thinking like that sucked the joy out of the positives of those other quadrants without leaving me any tools or motivation for dealing with the negatives. As I develop new thought patterns and habits I think things are going to start being different in my life and I look forward with enthusiasm to what the future will bring!

P.S. This particular system is developed by Florence Littauer. Following is a Wikipedia article and a very basic personality test. There are books and official tests available, but this is a start for if you want to know more:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personality_Plus
http://lynn_meade.tripod.com/id139.htm