Friday, August 6, 2010

Cousin Michael

It's already been over a week since we got the news that our nephew, Michael, drowned. He lived far away and we saw him seldom, mainly at family occasions, but we know what a close-knit family he comes from, and how much they all love each other.

Funerals and memorial services are over, and day to day living must continue. It doesn't seem right. Seeing the courage and faith of his wife, sisters, parents, and extended family is inspiring.

I wish we had known Michael better. The first time I met him he was only two years old, and I was new in the family. We were boating on Grampa's big boat. Grampa was up on top steering it, and Michael was on my lap down below. Knowing little about boating, and less about Michael, I was letting him play with the duplicate controls. Michael threw the gears into reverse or neutral or something and sent the boat to a shuddering stop. Fortunately, there was no serious damage nor injuries, but I realize now that Michael was already on the path he would follow all his life -- excitement! Live life to the fullest.


With visits here and there over the years, we got to know Michael a bit better. He knew just how to treat his cousins. Mash 'em with a pillow and they will adore him. It worked.


Mostly we followed the news about Michael through blogs and facebook. Marriage, baby, teaching career, he did it all with flair and devotion. However limited our contact was, there is no question that Michael, love of adventure notwithstanding, was someone you could count on.

There is a determination now, shared by me, to make greater effort to enjoy our wonderful extended family.


I wish there were words to say or things to do that would fill the big hole left by Michael, but there aren't any. I have seen family bonds strengthen and faith increase -- Michael's influence will always be part of the family now.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Where does all the time go?

It seems like not too long ago I was writing about my amazement that I was to become a grandma, and now, the little sprout is one-and-a-half years old and has a little brother. Like millions of my sisters, I have reached the age of looking into my past, and looking forward into my future, and seeing it through eyes that understand the wonder of new generations and wide-eyed, innocent new life. I am suspicious of the innocence though when I see the (can I get away with it?) look in little Benny's shining trusting eyes as he checks whether I really mean it when I say "no. Stay out of that box of candy."







Little Ephraim , on the other hand, has no mischeif in his sweet eyes yet, and if his wise, scrunchy little features make him look a little older than two weeks and earn him the nickname "Mr. Magoo", he is nevertheless as cute and lovable as he could be, and we welcome him with open hearts.




But when I asked "where does all the time go?" in the title of this post, I was thinking of something else -- the stretchiness of time -- and the timeless question, "what have I accomplished today?" that every mother asks herself at the end of a day when she surveys the messy house and uncooked dinner. And now I know. I timed it. The ocassion was the necessity of sewing five buttons on a shirt, a five to ten minute job. This is how it breaks down:

Finding needles and thread: 30 seconds.
Wiping Benny's nose: 2 minutes
Threading needle: 60 seconds (but it only took so long because my grandmother eyesight is not as good as it used to be).
Graciously accepting three pieces of lint from Benny's hand: 3 minutes (and giving them back and getting them back and giving them back and ....)
Knotting thread and sewing first stitch: 30 seconds.
Answering phone: 4 minutes
Cleaning up (with Benny's help) button box spilled by Benny: 7 minutes
Finding needle among the crumpled shirt cloth: 60 seconds
Sewing two more stitches: 30 seconds
Taking Benny to bathroom and cleaning up his sneeze: 3 minutes
Taking button box out of Benny's hand and putting it out of reach: 60 seconds
Playing Patty-cake with Benny: 3 minutes
Wiping Benny's nose: 30 seconds
Givng Benny some cheerios: 30 seconds
Earnest discussion with Benny on importance of not throwing cheerios on the floor: 2 minutes
Cleaning cheerios off floor (with benny's help): 2 minutes
Playing "monster's gonna get you" with Benny: 3 minutes
Finding needle among crumpled shirt cloth: 30 seconds
Catching Benny and wiping his nose: 60 seconds
Finding needle: 30 seconds
Comforting Benny who has tripped over the carpet edge: 2 minutes
Kissing Benny and giving him back to his mom: 60 seconds
Finishing sewing the first button and the other four, and putting everything away: 6 minutes

Grand total: 45 minutes and 30 seconds
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Is Benny adorable? YES
Am I getting much done when he's around? NO
Do I love being a grandma? YES!!!
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So anyways, now I know where the time goes....

China part 3 -- Great Wall

The Great Wall of China. Once again, words fail me. It is thousands of miles long. Thousands of years old. It's been repaired a few times (last time in the 1600's). Now sections of it are maintained for tourists. It's not exactly needed for defense anymore. You can see it from the highway if you are on the right section ----->


In order to see it up close and personal though, you have to go to places set up for sightseeing -- or be prepared for a long and arduous hike. Zixu was so good as to take us to the Simatai section of the wall, which has been made safe, but not rebuilt for tourist activities. Nicest is that a gondola took us 2/3 of the way up.
Imagine the poor workers who built it. No gondola. And carrying heavy rock!



Once on the wall (and climbing that last 1/3 is more than enough exercise for me! Legs and lungs were burning.) we had a spectacular view.














Parts of the wall were different from other parts
<---- this part had holes through which spears were thrust -- loooong spears!





Inside one of the watchtowers ----->
Umbrellas necessary to protect from the sun -- the heat combined with the exercise was just about too much!





More amazing views. It is almost incomprehensible that a place such as this could actually be built. We understand, however, that the cost in human life was very great.

Ancientness was just seeping out of the cracks.







Finally, having climbed, walked, climbed, walked, and taken waaaaay more photos than we can ever display, we headed back down. Since the group wanted to take the zip line, Dad and I were forced to do the same so the group could stay together (pretty fun!)










Although Zixu took us here on our previous trip, it was just as amazing, and breathtaking, the second time. Imagine. I have walked on the Great Wall of China! Twice.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

China part 2

I have over 4,000 photos to choose from! Not that I took all of them myself, but there was a group of us, all invited by Zixu for his sister's wedding, and we decided to share photos since it was ridiculous to all be taking photos of the same thing. (photo shows us sitting, at the far right Zixu and his sister (Zijing) and her fiance Tao (with the squirt gun), and the rest are Zixu's college friends that came). It's hard to believe that over 4,000 photos can be taken in 2 weeks! What were we thinking? I have this theory that we take so many photos because we want to bring it back with us, but we never can. Also, digital photography has made excess just as possible for the ordinary folks as for the professionals -- now WE can take 10 photos to capture just the right light or expression -- and we do!

But, WHATEVER! I am grateful that we can. If we can't bring it back with us, we can at least remember better. So, with that said, here are more photos of China. The above photo, as well as the previous post's nature photos, were taken on our hike past the Black Dragon Pools and waterfalls. The hike was in the mountains near Miyun, Zixu's home, about 45 minutes north of Beijing. It's not like we haven't hiked before, but a hike in China certainly has a different flavor --shapes, colors, how a public trail is run -- there were concession stands ( photo on right) and souvenir stalls where we are used to ranger stations and small museums. But having easy access to ice cream bars (bean, lychee, mango flavors) was very nice!

Afterwards we went to a lovely restaurant, also in the mountains, and ate, as usual, too much. They have a great idea in China! Big round tables with huge lazy susans in the middle, and then they just pile plates of food on them, and you snag whatever you want as it rotates past you. I need not say that we ate exclusively with chopsticks the whole time we were there -- and managed to gain weight despite this handicap. There was fish, beef, chicken, and lots of vegetables, very few of which we recognized. All completely delicious!


The next day we visited the Emperor's hunting lodge and summer retreat (mostly built by the Qing dynasty (1600's to 1911), the last dynasty before Communism took over) in the cooler mountains in the north -- photos also on previous post. Escape from the oppressive heat and humidity of Beijing -- the main seat of government historically and presently -- is very important! Indeed it was quite cold when we were there, and the umbrellas we bought were useful to keep us dry in the rain that fell at the beginning -- and all during the trip provided shelter from either rain, or relentless sun. Anyways -- All government business moved to this huge walled preserve in which we took an 11 km unforgettable scary open air tour bus ride (no seat belts, no railings, narrow road, steep road, cliffs and sharp curves, breakneck speed and
seemingly indifferent bus driver--although we did survive, so he apparently knew what he was doing). Zixu also gave us the opportunity to get a boat ride over to a hot spring, which, as it was warm weather, really didn't look all that remarkable although there were more cool buildings. The most remarkable part was when the boaters had an argument. We couldn't understand any of it, of course, but it SEEMS they were arguing about who would have the job of poling us over there. Apparently the guy who was sleeping wasn't awake enough to say, "not me" because they woke him up and he was one of the two that took us over.

Many days we ate at restaurants, but even when we didn't, Zixu's mom had wonderful food ready for us. If you look real carefully, you can see the rooster's head in the meat dish. We didn't eat that! but everything else was wonderful. We also got some basic cooking lessons, in part to reduce the work for Zixu's mother and aunt, and in part so I would learn to cook it so Zixu could have more homey food when he returns to Washington. It will take some practice before my cooking looks as good, is prepared as efficiently, and tastes as great as what they prepared, but apparently my efforts were good enough that they have hope for me. Still, much as we enjoyed all that genuine "chinese food", by the end of the trip, we missed good old bread, jam, and peanut butter!

So, next post, the Great Wall...

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

China part 1, Black Dragon waterfalls and Emperor's Mountain Villa

We had the opportunity, once again, to visit China, as guests of Zixu and his family, this time to witness the marriage of Zixu's sister, but, of course, they made sure that we enjoyed more than just the wedding..



Words cannot do justice to this experience, so this post will be mainly photos.....











Different sights as we hiked along the Black Dragon Waterfall trail.




















After our hike, we ate at a restaurant nearby, that had this lovely little garden filled with statues of comrades who played significant roles in modern Chinese history.









Zixu's family arranged for a driver to take us to the Emporer's Mountain Villa -- and we spent several hours enjoying this seat of government in the mountains away from the oppressive heat of Beijing.




Some places were serene and beautiful.











Others were ancient and beautiful.










It doesn't look cozy, but it is certainly magnificent.












Love the clothes! Although no one now wears the traditional garb of the emperor or scholar!













This place was so huge (the walls surrounded several square miles/kilometers of wooded and grassy grounds filled with occasional buildings -- besides being the summer seat of government this was also the Emperor's hunting lodge and filled with game). I could post endless photos.


This ---->
is a home built for a concubine who was no longer in favor with the Emporer -- it is far away from the main complex of buildings.





The nice thing about a hunting lodge is that there are many gardens, and there are few gardens as magnificent as the garden of a Chinese Emperor.

More offerings from my creative writing class

Sticky Love

I've heard of butterfly kisses,

how delicately they fall

from lips of tiny princesses

on our cheeks and

hearts.



But I've only a tiny prince

with fists full of sticks and dirt

who gives

peanut butter kisses;

sticky memories on my face.

Friday, April 9, 2010

Proof



For those who do not believe Ben EVER answers his phone--I witnessed it myself. Sometimes....he does.
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I have proof.

(This is not a posed photo)